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My Podcast is only being made because I no longer have a relationship with my son. It takes the place of our conversations and serves as a memorial, to him, to truth and to fighting the scourge of escapism, predation and bullshit in our drug infested culture.

Jun 27, 2021

Might be our last.

I lost my rage...where?

I sew a body back together with..remember..

A call from my daughter 

I transcend my own understanding and it's odd

I taped my son and I having our last face to face conversation 

What has changed?

every conversation could be my last

Jun 20, 2021

Good Cry...

I reprise a song I wrote about my children years ago

I was drowning in passions

Intoxicated, I explore my narcissism

is trying to get somewhere a vice?


I don't know what this all means yet..

I miss you son, I will see your sister and begin a jiujitsu school tomorrow, I will be thinking of you.


Jun 14, 2021

What do I do with my life?

It's up to me

I take Julio's advice

I recall my helping my son when he was little with something uncomfortable 

he teaches me 

It happens as I play.. 

It's at an angle

I don't know where I'm going but I make 2 choices

...I'm sorry

he beat me the last time

meaning, in lower-case...

Jun 6, 2021

I can hear you

A Crab's life

Are Humans special?

I asked my son to take me thru his death, to share it with me

everything is changing into something else

stop practicing..transform

how did I live?