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My Podcast is only being made because I no longer have a relationship with my son. It takes the place of our conversations and serves as a memorial, to him, to truth and to fighting the scourge of escapism, predation and bullshit in our drug infested culture.

Aug 29, 2021

It has been 4 years since I’ve seen my son 

I listen to my Shaman, he doesn’t even know he’s a shaman

what is it? 
what happened? 
where are you now? 

are we just our memories?

say it again.

I’ve been trying to keep you alive. 

Aug 22, 2021

What is you emergency?

Is overdosing selfishness?

I don't think they're breathing right now, bruh.

Not a legit emergency.

What is our civic responsibility?

I find a man passed out in his car with the car door wide open. drooling.

It's my life, It's my responsibility, it's my fault.

Leverage your shame and fight.

Aug 15, 2021

All This while weeping out loud.

What good is your mind without your body

Meth-head trout are just like us

I explore the word "soul"

I am terrified to confront my own origins 

I speak to an unidentified brother

I tap dance around the truth

Are we all one organism? 

I my son overdosed me as well as himself

we were an...

Aug 8, 2021

Words are how we deceive each other.

What if god's first utterance was "meh"?

Our experience of reality is not ultimate reality.

I face my lying self, I deceived my son with lies mixed with truth and half-truths about myself.

I help 3 children bury their father's bones, we created our own ritual in the pure moment.


Aug 1, 2021

I visit projections of my departure

I hear birds 

I visited a jiujitsu factory

I search for my path with eyes closed

I embrace a stranger who shares your name


I face a terrible thought